Looking For God

I was talking to one of my friends yesterday and she said that the Pastor gave everyone in church a little notebook and a pen to write down whenever they see God. My first impulse was to feel a bit of envy. Hehehe. I like notebooks. I want a little notebook. Not as though I don't have enough of my own little notebooks. :) I'm a silly human being. Anyway, second, for some reason, was, "Hey, that's really cool. I'd like to notice when I see God in my life and be able to keep the memory by writing it down. It wouldn't even be as boring as my thankfulness journal." I, as a pantheist, see God at all times! However, I am not aware of Her presense at all times. I forget. I don't stop and look. But, if I did, wow! Yesterday, I saw God all over the place. He was in the lightning, He was in the fact that I got home before it stormed, I left before it stormed, I helped my dad load the car with groceries right before it stormed, we didn't get hit by lightning, no trees fell in front of the car, and we got home while it wasn't severely storming. Woo! So, thanks God, for being with me always and showing me Yourself when I am aware enough to LOOK! :) God is marvelous, and so is the idea of looking out for Her, cause whenever I look, I will see!

I Saw an Angel

I searched
in a dream game
for treasures
I found
an angel
and she spoke
in conundrums
and turned her head
and her body away
leaving the image of wings
I grabbed her
to communicate
but she was done
and the game
of life
went on.

Life is Beautiful

Now I've missed May. Oh, well. I thought it was very interesting that on Thursday morning, having gone to bed after 6 am, I got up at 8 am and found the world outside to be filled with light- light that was clean and clear and crisp, and all it touched was washed by it, even me! Oh, it was so beautiful! I felt in that light to be a part of everything and I felt free. If I had gone to church at that moment, I would have been able to laugh and not be depressed. There is no judgment in that light. Everything is okay in that light. It was marvelous to be ALIVE in that light. I wonder how the world came to seem so bright after having watched many horror shows during the night. I have no idea, but it was cool. I was happy. How often does that happen?! Not often.

I recently found a Pantheism group, which I was invited to join, and have now been reveling in being with other pantheists. I've been so lonely. There may be only one other regular visitor to that group, but that is enough. I have read pantheism quotations and read about pantheism and found that it is more diverse than I could have imagined. Pantheists range from being Atheists to Theists-with those two views of God being so separate, how could anything unite them into one religion? That which does is amazing. If there were a religion that could unite the world, I think it would be Pantheism. It is already doing a fantastic job. And you know how I love unity! Oh, it's wonderful to know that I have a religion to call home! Yay!

Guess what? I am being me! It is a lot of work to be myself, but it was harder to not be myself. You know how it feels when you are being fake? Well, I was feeling that way a lot-stifled, squashed down. Well, I thought it was time to break free, as I said in April's post. And I am doing so. Woo! It is freeing to be meing. Hehehe. :)