Negative Spirals

Being negative toward the negative creates a spiral of negativity. I have read one too many times that negative thoughts create a negative reality. In truth, negative thoughts only create a perception- they have no other power. This perception then influences actions which have an effect upon the world around us. Depending on the circumstances, anything can happen.

What is it with all of these unproved statements saying: "If you don't believe in yourself, no one else will?" Does no one understand how unhelpful and uninspiring that message is? Those that do believe in themselves will agree with this, but those who do not.. they will begin a cycle into despair. I have tried it. I do not believe in myself, and if I listened to that statement, I would think that no one else will either, meaning, I really am not worth anything. But, thankfully, I have met people who DID in fact believe in me, even when I did not believe in myself. If it were not for them, I may never have experienced self-esteem at all. My thoughts, about myself, about the world, about my neighbors, have no bearing, no solidity, unless reinforced in action and in reaction.

Think about it... would the law of gravity exist if the apple didn't always fall back to the ground? If sometimes it floated under the same conditions in which it had fallen? No... and how then can this negativity for negativity? It is not always true. It is only true under certain conditions, making one have to change the hypothesis to: "If you do not believe in yourself, and you voice this outloud, and the people around you are not encouraging or supportive, no one, admidst that group of people, will believe in you." Not so very destructive then. One can just look for support elsewhere.

The truth is.... no one can make you believe in yourself. That we really do have to do for ourselves.

Here's another: "If you think you are going to fail... you will." Okay, who is that going to help? It certainly wouldn't help me. Actually, since I've just been told I'm going to fail if I believe I am, I'm going to believe even more fervently that I will fail. And around the spiral spins. If only these statements were not linked to the negative. How about: "If you believe you are going to fail... don't worry about it. Everything will be alright." And even if you do fail, what's so bad about that? If we were okay with the negative, instead of reinforcing a negative idea, we would calm the troubled mind, ensuring a relaxed and focused response.

Somehow it ended up backward and inspiration became only a place for well, happy, adjusted people, and not the ones who need it most. The ones who do not believe in themselves, see things negatively... they are called whiners, complainers, babies... such wonderful terms... along with childish, immature, and irrational. They are beat down at every turn, told to be happy or else. Told to hate hate and be angry about being angry. (Very silly, if you ask me.) They are apparently punished by God, people, the Universe, karma... this is cruelty. How did we become bitter? The cure is not in attacking bitterness- that creates yet still more bitterness- but in reaching down into the broken root and healing it. Do we expect the man with the broken foot to stand, unanchored, and walk, unsupported? Yet, we expect this of the emotionally wounded. Weird.

When did it become fashionable to stab the man with the broken foot in the toe? More wounds, more cycles, more negativity.

That's why I love this sentence:

"I'm not okay, you're not okay- but that's okay." (I'm not sure where I read this.)